I will never understand why sportsmen shower naked with each other in the showers. What is that about? Do you not talk about your men bits enough daily, so that you feel you have to look at others? I mean, seriously, perrlease. A bunch of smelly, sweaty, hairy men- just the thought of one of them makes me feel icky, but a whole shower room full? What is that about?!

Do you wait for a team mate to bend over and get the soap, do you ogle each others bits and think ‘crikey get a load of that’, do you think hmmm, and push your hips out in some sort of gorilla habitual challenge? Do you feel sorry for the poor bloke less well endowed than yourself or laugh out loud and point (ha ha)? Or is it simply a case of just having a wash? I truly believe that if you are simply just washing, then why not invest in a shower curtain or two.

Most straight men say that their biggest fear is a gay man coming onto them (while most gay men find straight men coming onto them is turn on, funny that). So, why shower naked? Together. In the same shower room. With no dividers. Hmmm.

I put this to my girlie friends and they sided with me. Girls tend not to wash together in an open shower (the average porno is very misleading…) and some even dash head to toe in towelling until they reach the safety of the lockable bathroom. We do get over this fear of seeing each other’s bits, but not until our boobs are fully developed. Being called fried eggs by men, let alone fellow girls, is no fun. Once this fear has dissolved we are open about our top half, but not at any time about our lady bits. Unless of course you are on the hockey or female rugby team...

So you can understand I just can’t get why men head into showers together, their towels over their arms, their man bits swinging in the not so fresh male locker room air. But the most confusing part is that once they have finished showering, they put their towels around themselves. I mean why bother? After walking naked, and then showering naked, why stop there? Why not just dry yourself off in the changing room with one foot on the floor, the other resting on a bench in a kind of Turkish dance style. Instead of scarves you could use your towels.

As far as I’m concerned your man bits should only be on show when you’re having a tinkle (do men tinkle? Or only women?), if you’re having a back, sac and crack wax, or in the bedroom with your other half. Lording and larking about in the showers with other people of the same sex just isn’t a turn on in any way shape or form for us girlies. So if you really want extra special treatment from your other half. Do not tell them about your shower time, instead why not wait until you get home and can have one with her instead. Less smelly and much more enjoyable. Particularly if your man bit is small.





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