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The Comedy of Errors

Left 'Pie-On: December

6 December 06 words: Martin Naylor
"As we tuck into the turkey, nothing short of nine points will suffice, lads"
When will I learn to keep my bleddy mouth shut? This time last month I was confidently predicting a comfortable November for the Magpies after a frustrating October.
So, last month, we throw away a two goal lead at Boston, get dumped out of both cups in the space of five days, narrowly beat a struggling Wrexham and get robbed at table toppers Walsall by a weak referee.
The boys seem to be making the right noises off the pitch, new loan signings Jay Smith and Darrel McMahon have both been talking up Notts chances of back-to-back promotions in the Post this week.
But it’s on the grass where we’ve looked a little shaky of late, with individual errors seemingly our downfall.
Back-to-back promotions, I ask you. Has nobody told either of these two lads that this is Notts County we’re talking about here? This isn’t the Warnock era you know chaps? We leave all that “we used to be a big club” malarkey to the whingers at the City Ground over in Rushcliffe.
The Fo*est fans I play 5-a-side with on a Thursday night still trot out the famous “we’ve won the European cup twice, you know?” routine, selectively forgetting that when they did, a pint cost 35p and you could find executive relief off a scabby tart in Hyson Green for the same as it costs you nowadays to get a single into town from Gregory Boulevard. Erm… so I’m told.
Anyhow, I digress. December could be crucial to Notts' chances of really mounting a serious promotion push. Before Santa empties his sack we’ve three home games against teams below us in the shape of Hartlepool, Hereford and the bottom club, winless Macclesfield. As we tuck into the turkey, nothing short of nine points will suffice, lads. We’ve one of my favourite away days at Darlington, where the charming villages of Teesside will be descended upon pre-match by a bunch of thirsty Notts fans all asking for “a pint o’ mild please, duck.”
What has now become a usual away-day on Boxing Day will, this year, take in the delights of Stockport before we’re all ripped off for more than £20 each to sit exposed to the elements at Swindon.
Enjoy Christmas, Left Lioners, I’ll be back in January with the New Year resolution not to be so bleddy confident in my monthly round-up. Come on you ‘Pies!

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