Picture this: rows of lads and lasses linking arms, all swaying from side to side in sync, smashing their two-pint steins together, a chorus of “Oompah, oompah, stick it up yer joompah!” booming throughout the room. Sod a fancy restaurant. Now we’re talking.
“We’ll have a couple of bratwursts and beers,” we said. “It’ll be an early one,” we said. Who knew that we’d be conga-lining around the room at midnight, screaming along to Stacy’s Mom and doing the Cha Cha Slide in unison. Christ.
Formerly Walkabout on Friar Lane, the recently opened Bierkeller spans over three floors. When the LeftLion crew hit the gaff up for the launch night, we had a grand time playing the free pool tables upstairs, and a few weeks later, a ridiculous night out in the basement emerged as a contender.
Strapped into our gold wristbands, we made our way downstairs, where we were greeted by proper friendly and informative staff, dressed in the traditional German getup, of course. A shot of Cherry Sourz was waiting for us on the table. A sign of things to come.
Included in the Gold Package (£20), we had a couple of fluffy-yet-crisp pretzels, doused in sesame seeds and served with cream cheese, along with a couple of two-pint steins full of the house 4% session lager; you can pick from that, cider, or a stein cocktail if you’re feeling... fancy?
Then there was the selection of bratwursts, also included; we went for the straight-up original wurst, alongside a chilli option. Both came served with skinny fries that were right on the nose. And, I tell you what, that chilli wurst had a right kick to it – tasty bleddy stuff indeed. The table was adorned with condiments aplenty, perfect for fussy boggers who like their sausage just so.
There were couples sat either side of us on the long, wooden table and, for the first hour, we were all relatively reserved in our Friday evening mission. But it wasn’t long before we were all stood up on the benches, toasting messily and laughing our damn faces off. The entertainment for the evening was second-to-none, perfect if you’re into no-holds-barred cheesy shenanigans – think Blackpool crossed with Bavaria, and a bit of Magaluf, and you’re on the right lines.
Our jolly and sharp-tongued host, lederhosen-ed up and Peter Kay-esque, was too funny, right alongside the trombone player and blonde-pigtailed dolly bird; apparently a UFC fighter who would “knock you out” if you tried it. The trio had us clapping, singing, swaying, busting out dance moves, necking pints, and letting ourselves go like nobody’s business.
Without a doubt, it was one of the most fun evenings I’ve had for ages. The next day, however, was not so much fun.
Bierkeller, 15 - 17 Friar Lane, NG1 6DA.