Ayup Duck: The Latest Nottingham News

Words: Ayup Duck
Illustrations: Rikki Marr
Friday 29 March 2019
reading time: min, words

What's ruffled his feathers this month?

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Jon Voyage
After sixteen years at the wheel, Jon Collins has decided to call it a day as Leader of Notts’ City Council. Love him or hate him, it’s hard to deny that he mixed things up, ruffled a few feathers and made an impact on the city, mekin changes to Owd Market Square and Triniteh Square, and droppin’ tram tracks all over the shop. But, more importantly, he decided to give us at the ‘Lion the exclusive scoop on his resignation, leaving some folk at other papers rahnd the city feelin’ more than a bit salty. Ah well, we dint want that lot followin’ us on Twitter any road. After over three decades on the council, Jon has earnt a bit of R&R, and plans to spend more time climbing and walkin’ rahnd mountains. It can’t be easy being a politician nowadays, and it sounds like a bit of a busman’s holiday to me, swapping one uphill struggle for another.  

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Storm in a Teacup
We’re survivors ‘ere in Notts, we always have been. No matter how lairy life gets, you can always count on us lot to band together, adapt and overcome. That’s why we’ll not let Storm Gareth ger’us dahn. Yes, a breeze might have wafted a little tree over on the M1 and caused minor delays, but we will rebuild.

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Between a Cock and a Hard Place
What the heck is crackin’ off down at Meadow Lane? Not only are County lookin’ like droppin’ out of the Football League for the first time, with their chairman accidentally popping a photo of his tonk on Twitter, but now they look set for administration too. Sort ya sens out, lads.

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Basil’s Brush With the Law
Remember when those owd codgers pulled off the Hatton Garden heist? Well, the last suspect has been caught and found guilty. Michael “Basil” Seed, who went to the Universiteh of Notts, was one of the big cheeses in the £14 million raid, and has bagged himsen almost twenty years at her Majesteh’s Pleasure. Who says you don’t learn owt at Uni?

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