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Overheard in Notts

16 August 21 words: LeftLion

What you sayin'?

“I take it you really hate poor people and minorities? I kind of thought this student 'humour' was a thing of the 1970s. But no. We now have the puritanical Left mocking poor people for cheap laughs” - Guy on Facebook talking about Overheard in Notts

"See all these nice places we could go to? But no, because you only ever want to go to bloody Pizza Express..."

“I’m coming for him on voice note!”

“She’s basically the Wario version of my last girlfriend”

“Surely everything can’t give you cancer. That would be mental.”

“Rashford, Saka and Sancho in an old-school tag-team match against Boris, Hancock and Patel. I’d pay a tenner minimum.”

“It’s this that always gives it away to my grandma. She always knows.” - Man pointing to the sweat on his forehead.

Man 1: It don’t claim to be a biscuit though does it? Just fig roll.
Man 2: Hmm. Think you mean fig cob.

“There's nothing like not being able to drink on a works do to make you realise how boring your colleagues are, is there?”

Kid, soaking wet, crying hysterically: Mum I'm coooooold
Mum, so over this: I told you not to jump in that water
Little brother, gleeful chanting: Your own fault! Your own fault! Your own fault!

“Don't point your finger at me, it's rude! How would you like it if I poked my finger in your eye?!”

“Honestly the state of this country. If this was a film, we’d be the bad guys and COVID would be the superhero I reckon.”

“It's 2% extra with the Fairtrade logo… Yeah, don't mention China at the moment. It's problematic.”

“I've had enough of both you and her. You're both thick.”

“So this dragon lived in a swamp yeah…”

“Small coke, no ice please”
“Is Pepsi ok?”
“Nah... make it a Strongbow ta”

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